Simply Girly

I think one of the challenging but important realizations for people in their twenties is that we’re not set in stone. Everything seems to move at an exponential pace, and the world tells us to get married, get a job, run, run, run. And we’re not truly left time to explore ourselves. Because the job, the diet, the career, are all things we start to find in our twenties, but that’s not us. 

Humans are not made of careers or partners or relationships (although don’t get me wrong, these can enrich life). I think a critical mistake we make, is associating ourselves with our settings, and the world around us, and assuming we are not dynamic, because sometimes our environments can be static. This is a blessing of humanity, that we can shift, morph and materialize as we continue to technically stay stagnant in location or occupation.

We can change our accents with every conversation, and learn new inspirational quotes from the internet that become new found core values. We can change our mentalities in singular conversations and learn novel states of being while simply sitting still.

My twenties, are somewhat gelatinous. Sitting somewhere in time, not fully liquid or fully solid, but something entirely new and yet, true. I learn new languages, and learn how people like to be cared for, and my energy fluctuates several times a day, taking many of my personality traits with it. I have fought so hard to define myself, simply so it can be simpler to understand my character, and at times this has been helpful. But at times it is a hinderance. Because I am not the descriptors many people give me. “Responsible”, “kind”, “unfocused”, “distracted”, “caring”. These are descriptors used by people who do not reside within my body, and do not carry my thoughts or feelings. They do not know how I can become somewhat selfish when I am overwhelmed or how angry I become when people hurt me. They do not know that my “distracted” state comes from sorting out the hundreds of tasks I must accomplish to support myself and others. They do not understand that I am neither meticulous or disorganized, but somehow both at the same time. No-one can describe me, and when they do, it often results in my detriment. Because people who call me responsible give me their responsibilities, and people who call me distracted speak of my incapabilities and find every excuse to discourage my goals. 

Why are people so quick to describe others, when humans are often too broad, dynamic, gelatinous for description? Why is it this frustrating to have people choose to describe you as anything other than human? 

There is no real solution to the forced characteristics people push upon us, however, I seek to challenge us all to choose fluidity despite the worlds attempt to solidify our person. I challenge us to be alright simply existing. It is impossibly difficult as an adult to understand that we do not need to be influenced by the perceptions of others, but hopefully, and with God’s grace, we can all find time to simply exist, and be alright with that.